Wednesday, October 22, 2014

Our final post....
Our adoption has come to an end. We have known for a couple of weeks now, but trying to find the words or really even wanting to share this has not been something I've wanted to do but felt it needs to be said. So many of you have been praying for our adoption. You need to know the outcome. This is the 3rd time I have said that our adoption is over. How crazy is this??? So, needless to say, we aren't really all that surprised at this point. We, well I, have been hanging on to a thread these last few months, really this past year. Denny already knew in his heart and was waiting for me to come to my own peace.  The final straw was the person we've been pursuing for a piece of paper to get our files. Doesn't have that piece of paper and has no idea who does.  There is so much more to our case than this, but this was the final straw, closed, slammed door. I stopped running, gave up, done, exhausted, emotional, helpless, tired, sad, lonely and heartbroken, wounded, angry and out of options and energy. No agency can help us even if we start over. We are finished.

 So much of our lives have revolved around these beautiful children and waiting it just seems like a normal part of life. But it's not. None of this has been normal!? I think the hardest part is wondering how this will affect the kids hearts.  Please pray for them that God would make something beautiful out of this and that the enemy won't have a chance to twist this into something ugly in their hearts. I cannot handle knowing that they are hurting because of me, of my bad decision to trust someone that hurt so many people. That being said though,  I truly believe that God has something amazing for them both, so much better than they could ever hope or imagine. I am so grateful and humbled to have been a part of their lives if even for just a little while.  They are pretty incredible kids and deserve to live out God's plan for their lives. I wouldn't want it any other way. 

 Thank you for being there for us. Praying for us, encouraging us and loving us through some dark times and some really hopeful times too.  We count ourselves so very blessed by all of you.  We have peace about this. surprises even me really. I know we will all be ok in time.  God will heal our hearts and we will all be stronger for it. God is good that way... and the person that lead us down this horrible path....well, she will have to endure the consequences of her actions. We know that God is just and we trust him with that too.

Here is a link to a Blog to support the very large number of families that have been victims of Heather Elyse and Giving Hope Rescue Mission.

With much love,
The Jeltemas...